The Transfer Window - The Monkey View

The Transfer Window – The Key Issues

As the Premier League takes a break, leaving us with nothing but the relentless drudgery of international football to endure, I look back on the transfer window and a dramatic deadline day to cast my scornful eye over the winners and losers on a club by club basis.

Arsenal

Leaving it later than a London train, Arsene Wenger and Arsenal finally moved to secure a striker on deadline day, snapping up the services of £16m Danny Welbeck. With Sanchez and Chambers already secure, as well as retaining their key players for once, Wenger is entitled to be happy with his work. Welbeck is young, experienced and mobile and is, on paper, exactly the sort of player who should be playing in the number 9 role for Arsenal. The caveat to that is he’s far from a proven finisher and one hopes this is his “Daniel Sturridge moment.” If not, he can always do a job out wide and complete with the 382 other players that Wenger has in those areas…

Star Quality:            * * * *

Value for Money:     * * * *

Overall Business:     * * *

Aston Villa

It’s hard to not look at Villa’s transfers as a group of players all deemed not good enough by their departed clubs. Joe Cole, Cissokho, Richardson, Senderos and the late, late, late capture of Tom Cleverley on loan. None of these players possess even an iota of “wow” factor but at least bring experience to a callow squad. Villa have started the season well and if Lambert can blend the youth with the proven mediocrity he has purchased… Villa might be even more impossibly boring than ever.

Star Quality:            * 

Value for Money:     * * * *

Overall Business:     * *

Burnley

The promoted champions have not got carried away over the summer. They have not stretched budget and have brought solid, unspectacular squad players to try and retain their Premier League status. It is hard to see any of them though doing enough to keep the Clarets in the top flight though. I mean, if you can’t even beat Manchester United, you’ll probably going to go down.

Star Quality:            *

Value for Money:     * * * * *

Overall Business:     *

Chelsea

Nobody has done better in the window that Chelsea. Taking the second best squad in the league to begin with, Jose has added the best striker, midfielder and left back that were available and has managed to finish the window with almost a net profit thanks to the ridiculous deal that took David Luiz to PSG. Chelsea are likely to win the league by ten points and when the awards for player of the year are being dealt out, look no further than Fabregas and Costa. In the words of Alan Partridge… scum, sub human scum.

Star Quality:            * * * * *

Value for Money:     * * * * 

Overall Business:     * * * * *

Crystal Palace

Given the appointment of Neil Warnock, NOT getting Paddy Kenny on the books has to be seen as a major triumph. Elsewhere, Palace have added youth and pace with the signings of Campbell, Kelly, Fryers and Zaha, whilst also throwing in the defensive nous of Brede Hangeland for a laugh. None of those signings are as good as simply keeping Tony Pulis would have been, but Palace still have enough quality in the squad to dream of 17t
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Star Quality:            * * 

Value for Money:     * * * *

Overall Business:     * * *

Everton

Retaining the loan signings from last year was the main item on the agenda and Everton have paid handsomely for Barry and Lukaku to do so.  Elsewhere Martinez has gone African with the signings of “now or never” former Ghana youth prodigy Christan Atsu and proven goal poacher Samuel Eto’o. For whom a generous two year deal will take him past his 40th birthday…

Star Quality:            * * * 

Value for Money:     * * *

Overall Business:     * * *

Hull

No team had a more dramatic deadline day than Hull who purchased Mohammed Diame, Abel Hernandez, Gaston Ramirez and Hatem Ben Arfa in a flurry of late drama. Indeed, Hull added ten new players to their books in all which would have made a bit more sense had they done so before being dumped out of Europe rather than after. As it is, how Steve Bruce will fit in so many new attacking players in his side is anyone’s guess. Unlike some teams though, it should at least be fun to watch him try.

Star Quality:            * * * *

Value for Money:     * * * *

Overall Business:     * * * *

Leicester

Only Burnley rivalled Leicester for the most underwhelming Transfer Window. At least the Foxes added younger, sprightly versions of their fellow relegation contenders. Mark Albrighton, Danny Simpson and Nick Powell all have points to prove. Whilst Leonardo Ulloa has already hit the ground running despite never playing in the Premier League before. Although credit where credit is due for the complete wildcard that is Esteban Cambiasso. Leicester will need all their new signings to bed in fast, especially at the back, if they are still to be playing top flight football this time next year.

Star Quality:            * 
*
Value for Money:     * * * *

Overall Business:     * *

Liverpool

The key questions at Liverpool is can Lallana, Lambert, Markovic & Balotelli do better combined than Luis Suarez managed on his own? Only time will tell if Rodgers approach of going for moderately expensive, mid-range talents in addition to the lottery that is Mario Balotelli will bear fruit. Liverpool certainly seem to have bought well at the back where Lovren and Manquillo are large improvements on the likes of Toure and Johnson. But with the exception of the late move for the entertaining Italian, none of the signings have screamed “must have” and work is to be done to convince people that Liverpool can maintain, let alone improve on, last year’s form.

Star Quality:            * * * (*) – extra star for super Mario factor

Value for Money:     * * 

Overall Business:     * * *

Man City

With a gentle nod towards Financial Fair Play, City have paid over the odds for Mangala whilst also securing the services of Caballero, Fernando, Sagna and Zuculini. Contractually obliged to sign at least one Englishman, City have “borrowed” Frank Lampard for a laugh. City had the strongest squad at the start of the summer and only Chelsea have gone past them since the window slammed shut. Keeping their spine fit and playing, will be the key to maintaining another challenge for the top prize.

Star Quality:            * * 

Value for Money:     * * * 

Overall Business:     * * (*) – one star knocked off for the perverse hanging on to of Scott Sinclair

Man Utd

They left it late and it cost them an arm, a leg and most of the body to boot, but Manchester United emerged from the transfer window with a significantly better squad than what they started. The squad remains thin in defence, but swapping Evra, Rio, Cleverly, Kagawa, Nani and Welbeck  for Shaw, Rojo, Herrera, Blind, Di Maria & Falcao is a massive upgrade whichever way you do the maths. Having started the season in appalling form, Van Gaal has a huge job on his hands to marry the new egos to those of his existing “stars” and put together a team which now simply has to finish at least 4th come May.

Star Quality:            * * * * *

Value for Money:     * 

Overall Business:     * * * *

Newcastle Utd

Newcastle started the summer doing what looked, on paper, to be some very good business. A slow start to the season has thus far detracted from the obvious quality of Cabella, de Jong and Janmaat. Those three signings however, able replacements in the full back and attacking midfield areas, can’t mask the continue deficiencies up front. Deficiencies which, going out on a limb, haven’t been fully solved by the sole purchase of Emmanuel Riviere, a striker who averages less than a goal every four appearances and has, thus far, one miss-hit assist to his name.

Star Quality:            * * * 

Value for Money:     * * * 

Overall Business:     * * *

QPR

You’ve got to hand it to Harry, nobody attacks Deadline Day with the same sort of gusto. It’s almost as if Harry still believes that if he doesn’t make a signing he’ll never be allowed to do so again. All manner of past players were targeted by Redknapp, not least Jermaine Defoe, before he finally settled on Sandro and, inexplicably, Niko Kranjcar. Who presumably now just takes a massive holiday each summer and turns his phone back on again for Harry to give him a buzz on Deadline Day. Elsewhere Harry added Caulker (sound), Rio (strange) and Isla (surreal) to his books along with a myriad of others that I can’t be bothered to list here. Well played though Harry. And don’t think we didn’t notice that cheeky enquiry about Younes Kaboul either.

Star Quality:            * * *

Value for Money:     * * * 

Overall Business:     * * * *

Saints

Manchester United aside, no club was more discussed during the transfer window than Southampton. Letting some 14 players go including the entire spine of the team that shone last time around, Saints were criticised from pillar to post before putting their hands back in their pockets and coming out of the window none too shabby. Bertrand, Forster, Long, Gardos, Pelle and Tadic all look like very solid signings, even if Saphir Taider was sent back in strange circumstances. Some very talented players from the fabled academy still remain and whilst Saints will do well to push on from last season, they certainly have no reason to fear a relegation fight.

Star Quality:            * * * 

Value for Money:     * * * * *

Overall Business:     * * *

Stoke 

A real mixed bag. Hughes added the stabling presence of Steve Sidwell to his troops, along with the well-seasoned Phil Bardsley. He also managed to re-secure the impressive Oussama Assaidi on loan, as well as the former Manchester United strike Mame Diouf. He has also gambled though, on the now serial loan reject Victor Moses and Football Manager player of the year 2011 Bojan Krkic. Who already looks badly out of his depth in a league both faster and more physical than he would surely like. Stoke fans will be happy though, with the signings in the most showing the way towards a more attacking style of play. Stoke have a solid and balanced squad and, as they proved this weekend, will be a match for anyone on their day.

Star Quality:            * * * 

Value for Money:     * * * 

Overall Business:     * * *

Sunderland

After a slow start, Gus Poyet added an eclectic mix of local and imported talent to his recent relegation survivors. Van Aanholt, Jones and Gomez all look like excellent additions to the squad and it’s nice to see Jack Rodwell being bought by a side with the intention of actually playing him. It’s about time Sunderland found a settled team though. The Wearsiders having purchased a frankly offensive THIRTY FIVE players in the last 3 years… and it’s about time some of them hung around and did their jobs.

Star Quality:            * * 

Value for Money:     * * * *

Overall Business:     * * *

Swansea

Recovered well from the losses of Davies and (more bizarrely) Vorm, along with the total abandonment of Michu. Tom Carroll is an underrated prospect and Gomis and Montero will add pace and power to a side already filled with it. The real coup though was the resigning of Gylfi Sigurdsson, who already looks to be on a one man mission to show Spurs what they could have had it they’d only played him in the right position.

Star Quality:            * * * *

Value for Money:     * * * * *

Overall Business:     * * * *

Tottenham

Possibly the quietest transfer window in Spurs history as they looked to sign exclusively full backs, before throwing in a midfielder nobody had heard of at the last minute seemingly at random. Still, given they signed 800 people last summer…

Star Quality:            * 

Value for Money:     * * * *

Overall Business:     * *

West Brom

After the most underwhelming managerial appointment of the summer, West Brom followed that up with a scattergun approach to transfer targets. It’s hard to marry up the purchases of say, Chris Baird, with that of Brown Ideye. Or to comprehend the signings of three right backs, included World Cup Star Cristian Gamboa… alongside the bringing in of Georgios Samaras. I don’t want to suggest the scouts were throwing dart boards at a Football Manager spreadsheet… but that is frankly what it looks like.

Star Quality:            * * 

Value for Money:     * * * 

Overall Business:     * *

West Ham

Amalfitano, Valencia, Zarate… it’s safe to say that Big Sam was under pressure to deliver attacking players and despite a woeful opening defeat to Spurs, it’s hard to make a case for anyone bar Chelsea having a better window than West Ham. The midfielder Cheikhou Kouyate is a phenomenal talent and Aaron Cresswell the best defender in the Championship last year. West Ham have bought pace and power to augment their current attack of power and er… permanent injuries. They’ve even bought Alex Song? Star of the greatest gif of all time (below) and, crucially, a genuinely world class player. In truth, I’m not sure anyone wanted to see this.

Star Quality:            * * * *

Value for Money:     * * * *

Overall Business:     * * * * *

Song thinks Puyol wants him to hold his hand… he doesn’t… it’s the little smile that makes it

http://footyreflex.com/gif/alex-song-trolled-at-barcelona-trophy-celebration/

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