The Big Issue - It’s not the players Arsene, it’s you.
And, well, the players. But we’ll come to that. Everton were once again involved in the game of the weekend, by virtue of goals, entertainment and drama if not actual quality. And whilst I’ll no doubt cover the poetic grace of Seamus Coleman, twinkling feet of Kevin Miralles and lumbering blind alley running of Romelu Lukaku at a later date... for now I’d like to focus on Arsenal.
Each and every year Wenger proudly boasts that this time his squad is capable of challenging for the title... and each and every year they come up short. This season, he added the star quality of Alexis Sanchez to his merry band of midfield maestros, upgraded from the French reserve right back to the actual French right back and snaffled upcoming star Calum Chambers from the much pillaged Southampton Youth Academy. The problem, is that none of that matters when Wenger has about as much tactical flexibility as a bunch of Sunday leaguers who still play 4-4-2 because “that’s the English way.” It’s all very well saying that Sanchez can play through the middle, but that is completely pointless if he’s going to play as a ball retaining number 9 aka Olivier Giroud. He is not that player and never well be, regardless of whether or not he’s fully fit. Wenger wants to have his cake and eat it by trying to emulate the Barca midfield template, whilst also having a big man up top to pump it long to. The second tactic might make more sense if Wenger had the striker resource of Manchester City (or even Manchester United) but he doesn’t. He has Giroud, followed by nobody else of proven quality and has thus far steadfast refused to purchase a new striker. Despite it being obvious to everyone in the entire solar system that he needs one.
Wenger could easily put out a team of Ramsey, Ozil, Cazorla, Walcot/Ox and Sanchez with Flamini sitting. The 5 midfielders, all well capable of playing quick, interlinking passing football, could rotate fluidly like the great Spain did prior to this World Cup. Ramsey has developed into a superb box to box midfielder and could burst from deep to enjoy the space created by a false 9. But the system doesn’t work when he sticks rigidly to a 4-3-3 which provides no cover for his fullbacks, no main focal point (if Giroud doesn’t play) and doesn’t allow the creative talents of Ozil and Cazorla to roam. It was no surprise then, that following Giroud’s arrival Arsenal looked a lot more dangerous. Scraping a draw they barely deserved and returning back home with a share of the spoils. This was a really poor game though, with a staggering 38 misplaced passes in the first half alone, and it smacked of two teams still hung over from the World Cup.
Arsenal will not win the title this year, or indeed any major trophy until Wenger allows some tactical flexibility within his ranks. Each and every week you see teams change the system as well as the players if things aren’t working. Wenger never, ever does. If things aren’t going well, all he will ever do is make like for like replacements until the final and inevitable whistle comes. Arsenal got out of jail this weekend. But with bigger and more vital tests to come over the course of the year, you sense they won’t get that lucky again unless they can either do something different, or actually buy a proper, world class centre forward.
And seriously what is with that kit? If it was any tighter it would be a wet suit. I’m pretty sure Sanchez couldn’t breathe...
Alternative Game of the Weekend:
Aston Villa v Newcastle. Two teams at the absolute pinnacle of their defensive power. Alan Hutton, Phillippe Senderos, Paul Dummett. A treat for paint dry watchers everywhere.
Potential Signing of the Weekend:
Angel Di Maria. Rumoured to be costing Manchester United a preposterous £63m, there are two things to remember here. One, is that United have been found to be wanting, with their pants down and desperate to pay over the odds for any top player on offer. Second, Di Maria is a top, top player. And no fee should detract from that fact. A player who was the best on the pitch in the Champions League final and voted the player of the season for Real last time around. The Argentinian will instantly be the finest player on the park when he meets his new team mates, and that is just about the only thing that matters.
Potential Gamble of the Weekend:
Mario Balotelli. £16m, certainly when compared to the above, appears to be an absolute steal for a player who is proven class. But aside from the fact that Liverpool appear to be collecting the World’s best penalty takers, this signing effectively amounts to taking £16m to Vegas and placing it all on black.
That is not a racist joke. Please don’t report me.
Although I could probably have used a better analogy.
Player most likely to be put in Garth Crooks team of the week for no fathomable reason:
Tom Huddlestone. Coasted through against the superior numbers of Stoke with a glazed “I can’t believe they’re playing this badly” look in his eye. Teed up the goal, casually stroked a few passes around with wand of right foot. Once broke into a run.
Actual Player of the Weekend:
Erik Lamela. Who? Exactly. Remember the name...
Quote of the Weekend:
Harry Redknapp on Malky Mackay “he’s not a murderer, a rapist or paedophile... he’s a great lad. He’s just made a mistake. People make mistakes in life and he shouldn’t be hung for that”
Harry, let me break it down to you nice and clear. It’s not about making a “mistake” here. A mistake is when you fall over and break something. A mistake is people who don’t know the difference between your and you’re. A mistake is playing Tom Cleverley in a football match. A mistake is not “being a racist”. That’s called, being a fucking racist.
Fantasy Football Disaster of the Weekend:
Having James Chester on your bench in Week One. And having him as your captain in Week Two.
Unexpected Goal Feast of the Weekend:
Crystal Palace 1, West Ham 3. Seriously? Who saw that one coming? Certainly not Big Sam. I mean, even Carlton Cole scored!? I know. Carlton. Cole.
This guy! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4laIHVZtBKE
Move of the Weekend:
Nacer Chadli’s second goal in Spurs 4-0 victory was preceded by a staggering 48 consecutive passes. 48!? Stop it lads.
What you may have missed:
Aston Villa not getting a shot on target. Everton & Arsenal scoring 4 goals from just 5 shots on target. Southampton and West Brom doing all they could to beat Villa & Newcastle to the final MOTD slot. Charlie Austin not even being in the match day squad for QPR’s hammering. Rio Ferdinand wishing he hadn’t been in the match day squad for QPR’s hammering. Barcelona coasting to an easy win with 10 men (for a laugh) in their first La Liga match. Tom Cleverley apparently finding a team mate with a pass. Leighton Baines growing his hair out. Mauricio Pochettino taking a lot less time than Louis Van Gaal to install a new way of playing. And finally, Derby County battering Fulham to make it four losses on the spin for the seemingly doomed Cottagers.
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