Monday 5 February 2018

Five Things we've learnt from the Premier League - Week Twenty Six



Salah stands tall amongst the madness
In what was another great advert for the Premier League, Liverpool and Spurs took it in turns to show how rapier attacking and tactical naivety will continue to win plaudits and not titles. The talking points muddied the waters in what was a fantastic match. Really, the only talking points should have been how much further can Salah rise amongst the list of Premier League greats and that Rocket from Wanyama. 

The Egyptian has already broken plenty of records this season and capped another sumptuous performance with two wonderful goals. The first he made look easy with clinical composure but the second was outrageous. It was the sort of goal that Barcelona are used to seeing from their talismanic inside forward, not Liverpool. Salah now has 28 goals this season. Messi, by the way, has 27.

Up the other end Harry Kane spent 85 minutes doing nothing and the remainder of the match going through almost every range of emotion possible. His first penalty was poor, his second was superb. 2 all, honours even and everyone was left to catch their breath and debate the decisions into the night. Right or wrong, football was the winner.

And Manchester.

Swans put migration plans on hold
It says everything about the current merry go round of managers that someone can now be let go by a team in mid table in the Championship… and a week later find themselves in the Premier League. Whatever the turn of events that led to his appointment, Carlos Carvalhal has thus far grabbed his opportunity with both hands. In the 9 games since he took over, Swansea have lost just once and have beaten both Arsenal and Liverpool. They followed this up with a well-earned point away at Leicester and for the first time in what feels like forever, their fans are starting to look at teams beneath them in the table not above them.

Swansea have found a system which suits them, with an emphasis on full backs providing pace and width and a solid middle. It’s a good job too, given their injury woes up front took a further knock post-match with both Bony and Fer being ruled out for the season. In what is shaping up to a real dog fight for relegation, with just 7 points still spanning the entire bottom half of the table, Swansea at least now have some momentum to hopefully take flight at the crucial time.

Arsenal enjoy their day in the sun
It’s not often when a score line of 5-1 flatters the opposition, but in truth Everton could have been 7 or 8 down at half time so poor were they in the first 45 minutes. Arsenal’s new look attack tore through them like a pack of Wolves. A back three of Keane, the rapidly aging Williams and the risible Mangala were so far out of their depth they all but drowned. 

Arsenal certainly needed this after yet another false dawn at Swansea, but this was the first time Wenger could field his first choice front four and he couldn’t have asked for anything more. Suddenly Ozil had players on his actual wave length to pass the ball to. Mkhitaryan brought calm and composure to proceedings, making everything look simple and waltzing away with three perfect assist to match Aaron Ramsey’s well taken hat trick. The icing on the cake was the sight of Aubameyang tearing away from defenders and securing a debut goal with the sort of chip that will have cocky school kids everywhere trying to imitate it in playgrounds throughout the land.

Sterner tests are to come for this new look side, literally immediately with Spurs and Man City (twice) up next. Win the first two of those games and Arsenal will have another trophy in the cabinet and be in prime position for the top four again. Lose and the Wenger Out chants will continue to rise in volume once more to a chairman and board who… well… aren’t listening.

Cherries march in to the top half
Following up a ridiculously impressive 3-0 away win at Chelsea, Bournemouth somehow snatched a victory from the jaws of defeat with two late goals to see of struggling Stoke. Eddie Howe’s side have finally found their groove after an uneven start to the season. Like Swansea, a switch to a 3-5-1-1 formation has yielded positive results and the Cherries were unlucky not to have got back in the game before they eventually did.

Bournemouth are now 9th and with the bit between their teeth and some nice fixtures on the horizon, they are very much in the hunt for the “best of the rest” hallowed shores of 7th. Stoke meanwhile remain in real trouble. They neither score enough nor keep enough clean sheets and Paul Lambert needs to find a solution quickly. The Potters have been in the top flight for 9 seasons now, more than any team currently in the bottom half.  At this stage, do they have anything to lose but at least try and give Saido Berahino a chance? The Burundi striker may not have scored in over 2 years, but he remains a player with pace and talent to burn.

Hold on. 2 years? Two. Years? What the actual fuck.

Stoke are screwed.

Saints finally find gold in the usual hills
Staggeringly, this was Southampton’s first win since November. A run stretching over a dozen games was finally ended thanks, in part, to yet another home grown hero in the form of James Ward-Prowse. The Englishman has been involved in 5 of his teams last 7 goals and bagged the winner here to cap off another impressive performance. Ward-Prowse lack the pace of many young talents, but what he does possess is an absolute wand of a right foot. His corners are better than Eriksen and Ozil combined and at times he almost looks like a young David Beckham with a sensible haircut.

Saints are used now to developing players like this only for bigger fish to come along and gobble them up. They’ve struggled of late but surely have too many decent players and defensive nous to go down. Sooner or later they probably need to decide if they want to try and go a couple of seasons keeping a talented squad together and see what they’re capable of.

7th. They’d be capable of 7th.

Team of the Weak

Adrian – Probably not his fault that his defence is collapsing in front of him, but this wasn’t a convincing performance and with Joe Hart waiti… no hold on. As you were.
Williams – Absolute shite.
Keane – Even worse.
Mangala – Shouldn’t even be a professional footballer.
Sanchez – Spurs could do worse than play Sissoko there. Seriously.
Choupo-Moting – Is he a winger? Is he a striker? Is he a number 10? Has posted some impressive stats at times this season but often feels like he’s just wandering around waiting for something to happen.
Noble – Never got to grips with the movement of Gross behind him and was ultimately punished
Schneiderlin – Protected the defence with a shield made of papier-mâché.
Alli – Absolutely risible for an hour before a dive so bad he should have been instantly dismissed. Spurs cannot continue to carry him every week.
Quaner – Yet to score this season. I mean, it’s February. Anytime you’d like son…
Sterling – Has been fantastic this season and City fans slating him post-match need to take a long hard look at themselves. But seriously… it wasn’t just the miss. The reaction after it was what I get from my 3 year old after I’ve told her it’s bath time.

And just in case you didn’t see it… and want to hear it in French… let’s all enjoy that Wanyama strike one more time…


Happy Hunting




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